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¿Question #229663?
purplewurple: The Sundered Land Game 35 [14]. "Half off! My First U-235 Atomic Energy Laboratory Physics Kit for Little Knights and Squires!" Its best buy date was 703.8 million years ago, but I hope there's still enough fissile material left for a self-sustaining reaction. I grab a box from the sales bin, tear the lid with my teeth, and dump its contents on the floor. The baker has stopped to pick up the bread I dropped, giving me time to put together a nuclear contraption, although not enough time to read the assembly instructions. Still, I manage to construct a fist-sized metal sphere with an angrily blinking red light, which I hope at least looks threatening. I stand up straight, sphere held high in my hand, and shout "I have a nuclear bomb! Let me go, or I swear to No Gods I'll blow this whole damned place to smidirins!" How does the baker react to my threat?

purplewurple: The gods have spoken! Dice were rolled and GrimReeple spoke loudest!
Derang3d: The baker has a sudden heart attack, leaving you with a fully operational nuclear bomb. In your haste, you put the clock in upside down tho... so you've got fifty seconds instead of five minutes.
TheGrimReeple: The baker (and it turns out, former science teacher) gives you a long and detailed lecture about nuclear physics. On the bright side, you learn a lot, inlcuding what the minimum quantity of U-235 required for a functional nuke is. On the not so bright side, it's over fifty kilos, and you're holding a lot less than that. In conclusion, your "bomb" is little more than a radioactive paperweight. And while all of that may be true, you realise too late that the baker's true purpose was to distract you so you while the Knights Custodian approached.
PolarDad: He sits down, begins snacking on the bread and casually says "Bet".
magikaru: The good news is that you scare the baker who runs off crying like a sissy. The bad news is that he’s calling the knights for help. And the ugly news is that the beeping of your improvised explosive quickly increasing in frequency.
MABBY: The baker laughs out loud. "Read the fine print on the package: Plutonium not included"!! More LOL and then it becomes contagious. Everyone in the store is LOLing and is either in tears or slumped over. You take this short window of opportunity to GTF out of there.
RealGuest: He points behind you at a Knights Custodian that has caught up to you.
Woelf: The baker laughs, then hurls a croissant that knocks the device out of your hand, causing it to detonate at your feet. Turns out that even in the Sundered Land there are laws about what kinds of products can be sold to children. That "nuclear" bomb was actually a tactical glitter bomb, and because you were within the small blast radius, you've just inhaled a lethal dose. The baker, still laughing, grabs a broom and tosses it to you. "Clean some of that up before your lungs collapse, idiot."
Woelf: The baker laughs, then hurls a croissant that knocks it out of your hand, causing it to detonate at your feet. Turns out that even in the Sundered Land there are laws about what kinds of products can be sold to children. That "nuclear" bomb was actually a tactical glitter bomb, and because you were within the small blast radius, you've just inhaled a lethal dose. The baker, still laughing, grabs a broom and tosses it to you. "Clean some of that up before your lungs collapse, idiot."
Grimsalt: (IN HUTTESE SUBTITLED) Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho... Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha... This bounty hunter is my kind of scum. Fearless and inventive.
pricero1: He says, "Go ahead, I'm insured."