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¿Question #4284?
Randy Cox: Which phrase do you prefer: "Useless as tits on a nun" or "More noticable than a fart in church"?

Hector Vortac: The word 'noticeable' is too long and clunky for a good phrase. It's tits.
Woelf: I've never had a need to use either of those.
Caerid: More noticeable than a fart in church.
popsicola: Both kinda suck
intrepideddie: You can never go wrong with the fart phrase. Just remember: He who farts in church must sit in his own pew.
Narlgoth: Useless as tits on a nun is funnier to me, but I actually think "sweating like a pedo in a nursery" is probably the most controversially amusing of them all.
tocoking: The nun one.
Felimid: Neither. How bout: "It's so cold that the thermometer went on strike"?
purplewurple: the former
Cringing Dragon: Our version of the first one is "Useless as tits on a bull", and I haven't heard the second.
Kyle Smith: The latter
2amp: i use the fart one
Frubgarde: My favourite is "as useless as an ashtray on a motorcycle". Concerning the two you have specified, I prefer "Useless as tits on a nun". A friend of mine regularly uses the "Useless as tits on a teddy bear" variant, which I also find amusing.
MisterCranky: I prefer the former, because thinking about the breasts of holy women makes me so very aroused.
ellephai: Neither, hate them both. But the 2nd is marginally less objectionable, though you can't spell it.
POvidiusNaso: The second one.
Geosmores: More noticable....
gypsychk: "Useless as tits on a nun."
Butterbane: More noticable than a fart in chuch
DHEK: "Useless as tits on a nun" because it is funnier and probably more easily understood than the other one.
Brentoon: How about "Crazier than a nun farting off her usless tits in church"?
aleo09: never used either
redjack11: I refuse to mix religion and biology in any form.
scriptorum: The fart one. A nun could use her tits to help lift a row of books to another room in the nunnery. That's useful.
tomlynch: The first one.
Leo-T: 2nd
The_GDI: the first
rawdawg: church one
Dweeb: He who farts in church sits in his own pew.
rootbeer: Let's call it a draw.
dmomo: A
arkibet: the latter
vampywife: "Useless as tits on a nun"
jellospike: the 2nd one
Nekura: Sorry, I'm not Catholic
lauramath: Actually, I like: Busier than a one armed paper hanger with the crabs.
Platinum Dragon: I prefer: 'That's like a nun riding a clown: virgin' on the ridiculous.'
Beowulf: Probably the latter. Particularly flatulence in an old Scottish church, during a wedding, wearing a kilt. Those several-hundred years-old pews have splinters. Or so I've heard...
bigbadsteve: tits on a nun are kinda funny
brainrob: You must go to a boring church
LemonyFresh: the latter
jasta6: My fav is "As useless as a screendoor on a submarine"
Loquutus: I like 'like a fish needs a bicycle'.
Majiken: How about a nun showing her tits and farting at the same time?
dave45: The first one
Gecko23: Neither, they are both church related, which is never appealing.
GuyHill: i like both!
javelin98: "Off like a prom dress"
djlg: The former is less annoying.
davedanger: tits are never useless
ping9x: The former
Null Signature: Tits on a nun
mrbeankc: Can I have a third choice please?
chaddyboy_2000: Useless...
jttm: The tits one
CDRodeffer: I prefer neither of these phrases.
Lord_Prussian: The latter
CortexBomb: I think useless as tits...the fart in a church thing isn't as true to life
Spielfreak: neither
puffinge: tits beats fart
skelebone: My father used to say "Useless as tits on a boar"